The Lust of the Flesh: What Is It, and How Do We Overcome It?

A man sits on the edge of his bed in daylight, looking at his phone, with an open Bible on the bedside table beside him

The recent news about the CEO of the biggest company in the world has left many stunned. But it reminds us of what Scripture has shown us all along: sexual sin is one of humanity's weakest spots. It has brought down God's people and the people of the world alike.

Scripture does more than warn us. It shows us the power behind sexual sin. Not Satan, not demons, but what the Bible calls the flesh. And it tells us clearly that we can live free of sexual sin and its pull.

Here is the interesting part: Scripture warns all of us to beware. No one is immune. If David, one of the best of God's people, could fall, and if Christians and ministers filled with the Holy Spirit have fallen, we must take heed. That is why Scripture says flee, not stand and resist:

“Flee fornication.”
—1 Corinthians 6:18, KJV

So what is behind affairs and sexual sin, for Christians and unbelievers alike? It is called the flesh. Not the meat we eat, but something spiritual and far more profound. Better still, we will look at the hope we have in Christ to overcome the flesh and live free from the power of sexual sin.

Understanding lust

Let us begin with the first word in "the lust of the flesh": lust.

In very simple language, lust is desire gone wrong. It is a strong craving or evil desire, often, but not only, sexual.

Our human desires are not evil in themselves. Many believers make that mistake. Yes, our fallen nature is corrupted by sin, but God made us with thoughts, desires, feelings, imagination, and the power to decide. None of these is evil in itself. It is not wrong to desire something. The Lord Himself says:

“Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart”
—Psalm 37:4, KJV

Lust is sin using our desires against us for its own purposes. Two things set it apart from the pure desires the Lord gives us:

1. It is an evil desire. Scripture uses lust for evil desire, just as it uses hunger and thirst for a holy longing for God.

2. It is almost irresistible—almost. Its passion is unmatched, and it makes sure you do what it commands. You know the feeling. When our hearts lust after something, it feels as if we will die without it.

The sad part? Once we get what we lusted after, it almost always fails to satisfy us, fully or for long. The Bible gives us one of the most dramatic examples.

Amnon and Tamar

A torn, richly embroidered robe lies abandoned on the stone floor of an ancient palace corridor at dusk

“And it came to pass after this, that Absalom the son of David had a fair sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the son of David loved her. And Amnon was so vexed, that he fell sick for his sister Tamar; for she was a virgin; and Amnon thought it hard for him to do any thing to her.”
—2 Samuel 13:1–2, KJV

Amnon was so obsessed with his half-sister that he became ill. That was not love. It was lust. Sadly, Amnon later forced her and raped her, and then the true color of his emotions showed. Lust had its way. It deceived him, promised happiness, and left him miserable:

“Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone.”
—2 Samuel 13:15, KJV

Lust promised him pleasure. It left him empty, miserable, and in agony, and he lost everything.

Amnon's story has repeated itself throughout history, and it repeats today. This is the lust of the flesh at work: evil desire leads to sin, and sin brings death to our marriages, our health, our joy, our lives. And it is not limited to sexual sin. The same power drives evil desire for money and power, and it drives jealousy.

Understanding the flesh

The second part of the lust of the flesh is the flesh.

If you have ever wondered what the worst enemy of the believer in Christ is, here it is: the flesh. You might have thought it was sin or Satan. You were close. But the flesh is a closer enemy, because it is part of us. Our worst enemies are not outside but inside.

It would take volumes to explain the flesh fully, so I will give you the key features in two parts: the natural and the spiritual.

The natural side

Man was created with a spiritual part and a natural part. The flesh is the natural part, and in this sense it has no direct relationship with sin. It is simply what allows us to function on the earth.

Man is spirit, soul, and body, living as one on earth. God made the earth for flesh and blood, so the human spirit can only live here through the body. The inner man, the spirit man, interacts with the natural world through the flesh: the body and its senses. You can read this because your eyes see physical light. That is the natural side of the flesh: our natural abilities, our five senses, and the body.

When Scripture speaks of the arm of the flesh, it means human ability:

“Thus saith the LORD; Cursed be the man that trusteth in man, and maketh flesh his arm, and whose heart departeth from the LORD”
—Jeremiah 17:5, KJV

When we trust in our own strength, or in other people, we are trusting in the arm of the flesh.

Many believers miss this potentially catastrophic side of the flesh because they see the flesh only as sinful. One of the greatest obstacles we can put in God's way is trying to do spiritual things in our own strength, whether that is living the Christian life or running a ministry.

The spiritual side

Like our desires, the flesh is humanity gone wrong. Within fallen man, a spiritual power came alive. It is the power behind sin. The Apostle Paul says:

“For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do”
—Romans 7:18–19, KJV

Paul was caught in a vicious cycle with something powerful, something part of him, that compelled him to sin. This is the spiritual side of the flesh: spiritual in nature, but rooted in the natural.

That is why the flesh is so subtle. It is not something outside you. It is part of the earthly makeup of fallen humanity. You will only be totally free of it when this fallen body is replaced by a spiritual body in the resurrection.

What then is the lust of the flesh?

Put the two together. Lust is a strong evil desire. The flesh is the natural part of man, corrupted by the sinful nature. The lust of the flesh is sin in the flesh using strong evil desires to make us sin.

Sexual lust is the classic example. Once that desire is there, it takes the Holy Spirit to destroy it. Otherwise it will almost always get its way. The flesh, with its lusts, is the mother of all sin.

“But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.”
—James 1:14–15, KJV

Diagram based on James 1:14–15: Desire, God-given and not evil in itself, becomes Lust, desire gone wrong; lust conceived becomes Sin, desire acted upon; sin finished brings Death in marriages, health, joy and lives.

Lust becomes pregnant and gives birth to sin! In most cases lust itself is not yet sin, except in cases such as covetousness, where the desire itself is the sin. It becomes sin when it gets the person to do what it wants. Sexual lust, for example, may drive a person to ungodly sexual encounters or to pornography. Lust is always evil, and it will produce sin.

Overcoming lust

It is possible to overcome lust as a believer.

We have all struggled with lust of some kind. If you have ever sinned, you have dealt with lust, the power behind that sin. You may be struggling with it right now. We all understand Paul's cry:

“O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin”
—Romans 7:24–25, KJV

Paul called himself a "wretched man" because a power to do evil held him helpless. But he did not end there. He thanked the Lord Jesus Christ, because he had found a new life, a higher life above the power of lust and the flesh:

“There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus hath made me free from the law of sin and death.”
—Romans 8:1–2, KJV

The life of the Spirit is your ticket to freedom from lust and the flesh. The unsaved can sometimes hold back from acting on lust, but rooting it out of the heart is a different matter altogether. Lust can stay in a man's heart for as long as it takes to get what it wants.

“This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh”
—Galatians 5:16, KJV

So how do we get free from the power of lust and the flesh?

The old man is crucified

The first step is the death of the old man, crucified with Christ. The "old man" is the sinful nature, the spiritual power behind the flesh that produced sin in us before we were saved.

“Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin”
—Romans 6:6, KJV

When you received Christ, the old man in you, the corrupted human spirit, was crucified with Him. A new you was created by the power of the Holy Spirit.

“Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new”
—2 Corinthians 5:17, KJV

Human nature had gone so terribly wrong that God's only remedy was to create a new man. Your way to freedom from lust is that new creation, through the Gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Why we still struggle

So if the old man was crucified when I received Christ, why am I still struggling as if I am not born again?

Remember the two sides of the flesh. What was crucified is the spiritual side. But the flesh also has its seat in the body and its senses, including our desires and feelings. That cannot be removed while we live in this fallen body.

Think of a train whose engine has been switched off but is still rolling forward. The new birth put the spiritual power of the flesh to rest forever. But the wagons are still there: this fallen body with its senses and our soulish cravings. Given the chance, they will do what they have always done and push us toward sin.

Diagram of a train: the engine, the old man, is crucified and its power switched off, but the wagons of the flesh, body, senses and soulish cravings, are still moving. God’s plan for now: mortify the deeds of the body through the Spirit (Romans 6:6; 8:13).

So what do we do while we are still in the body? God has a plan for this season as we wait for the resurrection and our new bodies. It is called mortifying the flesh by the power of the Spirit.

Mortifying the flesh

“For if ye live after the flesh, ye shall die: but if ye through the Spirit do mortify the deeds of the body, ye shall live.”
—Romans 8:13, KJV

To mortify the deeds of the flesh is to put them to death by refusing their cravings. For the believer, this means using the power of the Holy Spirit to say no to the flesh.

It takes the Holy Spirit to say no and succeed. Holiness is not just a matter of sincerity or a decision. It is a matter of power. A man may be sincere and still lack the ability to do what he knows is right. The Holy Spirit gives the believer the power to say no, a privilege the unsaved do not have.

But the Spirit does not stop at "no." He gives you the power to remove lust from your heart completely. Saying "no" is not enough. Keeping lust in your heart while refusing what it demands is like hiding a pile of burning coals in your basement and going upstairs to relax in your recliner!

Lust in the heart will find a way out. It may take 25 years or more. Yes, sexual lust can stay in the heart that long, and when it finally finds an opportunity, it will take delight in expressing itself. Falling into sexual sin is hardly an accident. It is usually the fulfillment of a long-nurtured desire that took months or years to grow. Lust in the heart is sin waiting to happen!

The Spirit wants you to enjoy a life free from sin on the outside and free from lust on the inside.

Living free of lust in our daily lives

Having the power of the Holy Spirit is one thing. Letting that power help us every day is where the challenge lies.

The world is flooded with things designed to arouse sexual desire, and the internet and social media have multiplied that a hundred times. Satan knows where humanity's weakness is. All he needs to do is feed lust. Once it grows, he can comfortably step back and let lust do its thing.

Here is the truth: the power of the Holy Spirit is your advantage as a Christian to live free from sexual sin. But that power only works when you cooperate with it, through practical steps of obedience and yielding to Him. And the Spirit's most powerful tool in our lives is the Word: letting it cleanse us, and yielding to it in obedience.

God's Word: the heavenly soap and water

An open Bible beside a clay basin of clear water in warm morning light

In my teenage years, I was told that all men struggle with sexually impure thoughts. So I expected those thoughts, and I entertained them, until the Word of God changed me.

I was also told that most Christians are pretending. They do not commit sexual sin, but inside they still struggle with the desire.

Brethren, that is not true.

Christianity is not a fake life. It is not dying inside with sexual desire while doing everything you can not to go out and act on it. You can live free from sexual lust inside and out. As I explained above, the secret is the power of the Spirit, given to us by grace. And your relationship with God's Word is where your freedom begins.

The Word of God is heavenly soap and water that washes the impurities from the human heart. While we wait for our heavenly bodies at Jesus' return, we must keep washing our hearts by the Spirit through the Word. If you are struggling with lust, stop fighting it. Put God's Word into your heart and watch the Spirit at work.

“Sanctify them through thy truth: thy word is truth.”
—John 17:17, KJV

“That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,”
—Ephesians 5:26, KJV

If you are silently dying inside with lust and have nowhere to turn, this is God's secret to a clean heart. Lust will not go away just because you are a Christian. It is washed away by the Spirit through His Word. You can not only mortify the deeds of the flesh but also guard your heart against lust.

“Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life”
—Proverbs 4:23, KJV

Give lust an opportunity and it will gladly make its home in your heart, waiting to become pregnant and deliver sin! We must stay on guard as long as we are in this earthly body.

There is a price to pay for a clean heart. It is not a billion dollars. It is feeding on the Word of God constantly and fellowshipping with the Spirit in prayer. It takes the Spirit to overcome lust and the flesh, and the Word and prayer are how you prepare your heart for Him.

As our hearts grow stronger, saying no to the flesh and yes to the Spirit becomes easier and more natural. Here is the dilemma of most believers: they have been taught not to give in to the flesh, yet they are still crying out like Paul, doing what they do not want to do:

“For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I”
—Romans 7:15, KJV

You need the Holy Spirit. Religion will not do it. Church will not do it. Being a "good Christian" will not do it.

Do not fall into the trap of loving the Lord while dying silently inside with evil desires. Some Christians have concluded that a life free of sin and lustful thoughts is simply not possible. They read Romans 6, about our freedom from sin, and their experience tells them it cannot be true. Other Christians agree, so they settle quietly, assuming everyone struggles the same way, and they think those who speak of the life of the Spirit are faking it.

The Lord knows that as long as we live in this body, temptation will continue, and we will sometimes sin in what we do and say. He has made ample provision for our forgiveness and cleansing. But living a daily life of sin and the lust of the flesh is a different matter altogether.

My story: the cleansing Word

Those impure thoughts stayed with me into my early years in the faith. I told myself it was truly not possible to have a pure mind. Boy, was I wrong!

One year later, as I spent hours meditating on the Word, God had opened it to me and washed my mind so thoroughly that I could hardly remember the last time I had struggled with those thoughts. I had also seen a few pornographic scenes on TV that kept replaying in my mind, and I did not know how to get rid of them. Thank God for heavenly soap and water! The Word cleansed my mind so completely that those things became stories of the past.

Why am I telling you this? To assure you that your faith in Christ is not fake. The Word of God works. You can be free from the deeds of the flesh and from the inner battle with lustful desires.

The worst thing we can do is ignore the lust in our hearts and carry on as though it is not there. It will keep growing and looking for an opportunity, even if that takes 50 years!

Do the hard work. Get God's Word into your heart and watch the wonders of the Holy Spirit. If you do not sow to your spirit through the Word and prayer, do not expect to draw strength from the Spirit.

“For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting”
—Galatians 6:8, KJV

Flee, not resist

Scripture tells us to flee sexual immorality. Fleeing is a form of resisting, of course, but an extreme one.

Here is why: sexual sin touches humanity at one of our weakest points. So God's advice is simple. Do not try to fight it. Run from it and leave it alone.

Joseph runs out through a sunlit doorway while a hand behind him holds the cloak he left behind

Imagine Joseph alone in the house with Potiphar's wife as she asks him to lie with her. Now imagine Joseph staying in that room, holding her, explaining why he cannot.

No, not Joseph. Joseph ran.

“And she caught him by his garment, saying, Lie with me: and he left his garment in her hand, and fled, and got him out.”
—Genesis 39:12, KJV

She held on to him, but he left his clothes and ran.

Brother, sister, do not wear yourself out trying to fight sexual desire. Run. Do not put yourself in situations that arouse sexual desire and then try to contain it. Show me a man or woman who keeps watching sexual scenes in movies or on social media and keeps a clean mind.

If you struggle with sexual lust, be careful what you watch and what you listen to. Those two gates let in most of the food Satan uses to feed lust in our hearts.

Diagram: two gates to the heart, what you watch and what you listen to. Most of the food Satan uses to feed lust comes in through these two gates. Guard them. “Keep thy heart with all diligence” (Proverbs 4:23).

Bottom line: having the Holy Spirit is not enough. A holy, clean, sanctified life requires you to be set apart for God and to give Him your body.

Your turn

I cannot fully cover this subject here. But let it remind you that the battle between the Spirit and the flesh is not a one-time thing. It did not end the day you surrendered to Jesus. It is a daily decision to yield to the Spirit and give God your body and mind as a living sacrifice.

Yes, an affair as the CEO of the largest company in the world is a disaster. But think about this: he is out because he got caught. How many have not been caught? What if God opened our eyes to see everyone as He sees them, including prophets, teachers, pastors, and Christians?

You see why grace for one another is critical. We do not condone sin, but we remember that the only reason we are standing is Christ's love and grace, not our efforts to be good Christians.

Have grace for others. Watch your own life, and beware. And thank God for Jesus, who made it possible for us to be forgiven and gave us the wonderful gift of the Holy Spirit.